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Difficult Confession: The Vicious Bullying Cycle

I have a difficult confession to make.

One I am ashamed about.

But one that I think is important.

I have been on multiple sides of the bullying issue.
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Reminder Reflections: 8 Lessons Remembered From Last Year

Since July happens to be the start of my “new year,” summer has come to be a reflection point for me. As I reflect on the last year, I have to say as I get older I have gotten better at celebrating and being celebrated. I just finished a business book about cultivating teams and collaboration. One of the concepts that struck me was the idea that people need to reminded more than they need to be instructed (props to Patrick Lencioni).
I don’t feel much wiser than I was thirty or even 365 days ago (or that much older, for the record thankyouverymuch); but I do feel reminded of a few things that I may have lost sight of for a bit.

Rounding out my year: 2016 version update

I’ve never been a fan of round numbers. They feel too perfect, almost fake. And even though last year was a perfectly round number of a birthday, it came after a less-than-perfect year.

I’ve come to believe all things balance out if you give it enough time, nothing stays the same and I’ve come to a place where I don’t want it to. I look forward to change–not for the sake of stirring sh-t up–but to progress and become better, get to the next iteration.
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Happy Birthday: Being Lucky in Love

I woke up this morning officially another year older, hopefully wiser and definitely grateful. The week-long build-up to today has made me feel so loved and appreciated it is beyond words. I started off believing that this was not a year to celebrate. That because personally, it was a “difficult year” and things were “challenging” I wanted to let this occasion pass silently, swiftly and simply ignore it.
Instead here is what happened:

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Some Gifts Leave You Speechless

My daughter was almost two when I became pregnant with my son. She was curious and fiery, sassy and sharp, creative and snuggly, and (although I may be biased) strikingly beautiful with her fair porcelain complexion that could sprinkle with freckles in even a drop of sunlight, red curls framing her face and hazel blue eyes.

All of these things were glorious. But my very favorite thing about my daughter is her kindness and her compassion (now I’m not saying all day, everyday–she is still human–and her brother may dispute this claim, but when it happens it is truly spectacular).

When my son arrived, it was earlier than expected, almost six weeks in fact. So my then-husband and I were in a bit of a scramble the morning I went into labor. We had not planned for his arrival this early… What to do with the baby (our daughter, in this case), so I was off to the hospital solo. And as I left the apartment, I could hear her crying “mama” as I entered the elevator.

40 things I’ve Learned Over 40 Years 

July is less than 90 minutes away. As a kid the beginning of July was like the countdown to the New Year at midnight. Every day until the twelfth I would get giddier, more excited, convinced that each year would make me smarter, prettier, more adept.

One year, I think it was when I turned five, I remember waking up and running to the easel standing in my bedroom and drawing a flower with crayons. Armed with the certainty that because I went to sleep a four-year-old and woke up a much savvier five, I would craft a more perfect, more precise flower. That drawing, framed and dated, would hang in my mothers’ hallway for years.

So now, on the cusp of 40, I am not going to wait until the morning of my birthday to feel older and wiser. I am in a reflective mood and decided to start to ponder what I have learned over the last four decades, and I chose (appropriately) 40 things. I wasn’t totally sure I could come up with that many things worthy of note–perhaps not all are to everyone–but they have special meaning to me.

So, for those who care to partake, the 40 most meaningful things I’ve learned in the last 40 years.  Maybe I’ll come up with a completely different set by 50.

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Taxicab Confessions: Birthday Edition

I was in the taxi with my kids yesterday, on our way to the movies. We were having a conversation about, of all things, my birthday. They both know how old I’m about to turn, 40–or as my daughter likes to say, “the big 4-0” and my son likes to remind me “that’s four decades, mom”–and they feel “it’s a big one.” So in the cab, they were debating the virtues of different celebrations, ideas and trips we should consider. This has been a rough year, as you may have previously read–and it’s hard to get up the gusto to want to celebrate in a manner that’s out of the ordinary right now. My answer was “it’s just a number, like any other…lets just do what we’ve always done.”  

And then I saw a post from a friend the night before.

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Countdown to 40: Conquering a Fear-A-Day

In exactly 250 days I will turn 40 years old.

I didn’t expect the idea of 40 to feel different than, say 38 or 39 (and perhaps it won’t when it finally gets here) but right now the idea of a new decade seems substantial in a way the others didn’t. Here’s what I mean: I built my thirties around the idea of wanting more–more recreational time and friends (why couldn’t I aspire to “have it all”?), maybe more babies (upon further consideration that was nixed), more career and money, more and more…

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Looking Back on Summer: Baseball, Camp, Forgiveness and Faith

This is the longest spate I’ve not posted on my blog. It’s so funny, the reason I usually stop writing is not lack of ideas or things to say, but too much to say. It becomes overwhelming and I don’t know where to start. Much has happened already this year, some I have shared and some I don’t, well, know where to start… Some seems almost moot now. I sent my kids to camp: baseball, theater and technology (yes, technology). We were all pretty busy, so no vacations were planned although we did go on a few day trips: Coney Island, the Ripley’s Museum and Madame Tussaud’s.

But the crux of my summer boils down into better understanding three primary themes: Forgiveness, Authenticity and Faith.

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